Swimming in the Deep End

I was watching a movie the other night about a married couple. The movie was fair, but not great. It did however have an interesting take on things, especially for people who have been married a number of years.

It is true that there are a lot of mundane, non-exciting things that come with marriage…paying bills, picking up after kids, making meals, doing laundry…the tasks can seem endless.  And life can seem a little monotonous. Everyone feels this way at some point. It’s part of being human.

And so the tendency might be to start looking around for things that are exciting and new. That might come in the form of a vacation or another car or another job or another business deal.  But for some, it might involve looking for a new person who will ramp up the excitement in a rather desperate housewife sort of way.

There is no doubt that new relationships can be intense and exciting.

But we’re not supposed to stay there forever. Or to ditch the relationships when they aren’t new and quite as exciting as they once were.

Our society tells us that new is best, and that when something gets old, you replace it. Sadly, we’ve seen that happen even with people.  

So, my take-away from this particular movie was that after the newness and excitement of  the relationship have worn off, whether it be in friendships or in marriage,  then that gives us an opportunity to go deep which takes time and energy and vulnerability and trust.

 Depth is not easy, but it  is where we should be heading in our relationships, not trying to reclaim new.

“I feel so strongly that deep and simple is far more essential than shallow and complex.” – Mr. Rogers



1 Response to “Swimming in the Deep End”

  1. December 30, 2010 at 1:45 pm

    Love this post, it’s so true in our society! Glad to hear your thoughts on sticking through and finding what’s important!

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